Alien’s Journal : Happy Birth Day!

Dear you,

We are just 18 days different, I am older than you. Tomorrow is your birth day. Yeah, Happy birthday in advance. Only wish the happiness for your life ahead. Be a good one in every circumstance. I like you just the same.

Too directly tell it huh? Well, before I explain what I feel. Love is sometimes scary. Well, whatever you have told me in two days before my birthday (August 24th), I still have the same, yeah something called ‘feeling’. Same shape, smell, and color of feeling for you. Don’t know why, although you had left me such a pain.

Really, until now I can’t think why you did this to me. When I ‘hi’ you, you replied. Then I was still being myself, pretend that there is nothing wrong happen between us. But you just lock me. Said it is not good for us to talk. I remember, words you told me before you lock my number at that time.

‘Let us avoid each other for some more time. Happy birthday.’

Firstly, I was so happy that you remember my birthday. but after i found you lock my number again, suddenly the pain appeared, it is like something hit my heart. You know at that time, I was in cafetaria, after teaching Korean, I ate alone there. Then my tears came down. You hurt me, again.

And now, days before your birthday, you are on there, unlock my number and give me ‘hi’ again. I hate myself, because I reply it. And the reason why you pinged me that i can not get it.

See? We are hardly friends since I like you. I dont know how to be like when we were in first time we know each other. It has broken. Our friendship. Please, if you want a happy for me, give something that can not break my heart please. I dont know how much tears I cry. It because I took it too serious. Or I took my feeling too serious.

I thought you want me, but maybe it was wrong. Seriously, I am sorry. I am too childish, i don’t know how to act when loving someone, someone that… that… okay forget it. I just want to write it down, on my blog, while my favorite songs play for giving some emotion on it. If I talk to you about this, maybe you will lock me again, and gone forever. 

I just want you to be happy. Happy birthday, my dear.

PS. Don’t reach out me. you said.

#Aliensjournal: 3 Tahun Lalu

Inilah hidup, tak ada yang sempurna.
Sama seperti kata Murakami penulis asal jepang. ‘Tak ada kalimat yang sempurna, begitu juga tak ada keputusan yang sempurna.’

Kita pernah sepakat untuk menyudahi, tak ada lagi sapa. Tidak menghiraukan jika salah satu dari kita melanggar.

Sama seperti keputusan itu, yang tak sempurna. Malam ini kita malah tenggelam lebih dalam. Sepertinya biarpun lautan semakin dalam kita tahu bahwa akan semakin gelap, bahwa akan semakin besar tekanannya. Tapi toh kita terus tetap tenggelam. Menikmatinya.

Inilah hidup, yang kita suka yang kita mau belum tentu baik dan belum tentu jadi milik kita. Begitunya dengan yang kita benci yang kita jauhi belum tentu buruk dan belum tentu hilang dengan sendirinya. Sungguh yang kita suka itu mudah berubah, seharusnya yang kita cari itu sesuatu yang kita butuhkan.

Ah, biacara apa.
Itulah manusia.
Tapi aku tak pernah menyesal, bahkan berterima kasih. Walaupun tak sejalan dengan apa yang aku yakini. Aku tak pernah menyesal pernah bilang suka, pernah bilang mau. Aku tak pernah malu dengan semua yang pernah aku perlihatkan. Berterima kasih atas pertemuan dan persahabatan ini. Sulit memang tapi biar berjalan dengan sendirinya saja.

Sama seperti katamu:
“Aku nggak tau, ini seperti apa ya. Setiap ngobrol sama kamu aku seneng, ibaratnya kalau anak kecil menangis, merengek, lalu diberi coklat atau es krim dia pasti merasa senang lalu tenang. Ya itu sama seperti aku tiap ngobrol sama kamu.”

Berarti aku es krim mu. Haha.

Terima kasih untuk malam ini. Cukup membuatku tak merasa sendiri, biarpun sebenarnya aku tak pernah sendiri.

Posted from WordPress for BlackBerry.

3 years ago.

Random #2

Watch out, there’s an alien in my room!

Dear Penu,

Good morning, i fail again keep the promises. you said i only permissible to mail you at least on next March. but please read this, i only want to inform something, something weird happened in my room.

i got shock, trully.

When i woke up from the very long dramatic night with you, i found odd creature stood up on edge of my bed. First time i saw it, I was only shaking. I was afraid.
Slowly but sure, I came nearly. You know what did I saw? It’s ALIEN. A L I E N. I never believe about alien, because I’ve never ever seen it before.

Then i dare to give its greeting first. Ohya, i think that alien’s gender is female, since i saw the shape of its body, looks like a girl.
First she was only look at me, without saying. I accost her and ask her why she came to my room.

You know what she said, it because she heard the kunjukunna song from my room lat night. Good gracious! She said that she was from the planet called Kunjukunna. do you know it? I’ve never heard it before. I only know the 9 planets, Mars, Venus, Earth, Pluto and so on. Not Kunjukunna, it’s lol. But since i saw her face was pale and looked so sad, i kept in mind.

She also heard Kunjukunna song from your room actually, but since you are a boy, she couldnt enter it.

Then now, i make a friend with her. But i want her to turn back to her place soon, that Kunjukunna planet. Because i think she looks doubtful and sad, she needs her family and friends, not me or stay on this earth. It’s not good place for her. I want she return before night comes. Yeah you know, it because tomorrow morning I’ve should start my new job. I only want to send her home. i dont want mom & pap know there’s an alien in my room.

I dont know when will able to talk with you again. Thank you and happy Sunday Penu~ Keep this story from others. The alien is not only a story or joke, it’s true! Ssst.